Lossing a Mother's Love

It was such a news when I heard that Jin's cousin, Yean has passed away recently after delivered her 2nd son. Everything was fine on the 1st day but due to her heart failure the toxin in her system wasn't able to be flushed out and so she breathe her last breath on Saturday at 7:30 pm in HUKM. I thanked God that she gets to know and accepted Jesus before leaving forever. Yes, she returns to heaven and it shouldn't be such a depress moment. However, I am only concern about her 3 years old daughter and her newborn son. They will be missing their mother's love as they grow up. There won't be any replacement for a mother's love.

Upon hearing the news, I broke down on Sunday and get my comfort from my mother. I know that it's my mother's love that I can get the comfort. Moreover, being a mother myself I know that our children do need our tender, loving and care. It's really pityful seeing these little ones growing without their mother. It's a painful experience for me to bear.

I was confused and I questioned God on this issue. Why did God take Yean away from her children? Why should God allow this to happen? All this questions and no proper answers... deep in me, I also feel that I have failed to carry out my responsibility well as a Christian - to continue praying until the end. It's like we had counted the chicks before the eggs hatched! Yes, the doctor told us that she is under observation for 3 days, she will only be confirmed well after 3 days! So... I failed to continue praying for 3 days...!

There are so many "why" but I can only accept the fact that it's God's plan and His will!

Oh, God I pray that Joey and her little baby brother will be well taken care of even without their mummy around. Heavenly Father, send your angels be with them. Shower them with your love. Please Lord, give Joseph the strenght and be with him. Assure him of YOUR mighty and unfailing love. Only in you we depend on. Bless the little children. Thank you Jesus. In Jesus's name I pray. Amen.

Everyone's Darling

Last weekend during our visit to Melaka for cousin's wedding, lil Maximus became the center of attraction in the family. He is everyone's darling and in return he also accepted everyone very well. I was really relief to see how he cope so well even we have not been back for so long. Maximus doesn't mind anyone carrying him but with a condition that they have to bring him for a walk...good trick!

During the wedding dinner, my youngest ah-ku was carrying him for the whole time and Maximus was so willing to be with him too. That give me some freedom although I wasn't get used to it because I have him with me all the time. Maximus was also having fun with his cousin Leroy (3 years old) and both enjoy each other company too. Leroy takes good care of him - wiping his drooling salvia, sharing his toys and playing together. It's was such a sweet thing to see both little ones having each other company. All the yee-poh can't wait to get their hands on Maximus too. It's like a passing puzzle where everyone passed him around.

It's a good family gathering-good food, fun and laughter. And I am glad that my Maximus was able to adapt well into his extended family.

My sensitve lil one

I read about baby at 10-months are easily frighten with unfamiliar loud noise or things that he doesn't understand. There are things that a 10-months enjoy exploring but not the ringing doorbell, the vacum cleaner or a bang! Parents need to reassure them and comfort them when they are fighten and fearful.

Maximus on the other hand is a little sensitive towards these loud noises especially a cry of little children or other baby! He started to show the first sign when he was in his late 8-months but now, he does it more oftern than usual. It's more like a domino effect! Each time when other child / baby starts crying... in less than the count of 3, he begins too. My mother said he is full of compassion and can empathized on the other's feeling. Well, I am not sure about it but can agree to it. I associate it with being sensitive and timid. Maybe he senses and associates crying sound to danger or scolding. So he started to get frighten.

Other than that, he cries when we (besides me - he laughs when i say "no") said "No!" He understands what's a scolding is. Recently, he cries when he heard a loud sneeze or daddy blowing his nose or "hep" as to stop him from doing certain things.

He is an intrapersonal child. He is fit and strong physically but on the inner side he is rather sensitive. He doesn't cry when he knock his head or fell down but he cries when he heard other baby cries. I hope to toughen him so that he can be more emotional in control. Of course, he is just a 10-months but it's better to start now from early age. Hope he will understand in his later age as he matures further.

Settling himself to sleep final...

After few months of trying to train Maximus to settle himself to sleep (part1 & part 2), every patient and hard work has bear result. Finally, Maximus is able to settle himself back to sleep when he suddenly jerk from it. I guess he has found his favourite spot and position to comfort himself.

This is also the result of the weaning process - Maximus is no long given breast milk before bed but on formula. He is slowly in the process of weaning off from breastfeeding. So, the formula milk makes him full and sleepy too! hehe... (just assuming).

Now from his last feeding at 10 pm, Maximus sleeps through till 6 am for his next feeding. Then I will breastfeed him till the second feeding in formula. He has also learn to be independent when it's bedtime. But sometimes, during his mood swings he will just refused mummy feeding him with formula, so Jin will take over.

Maximus has really grown and matured now. But sometimes, I still want to cuddle him. I am glad that he can be independent sleeper although he doesnt sleep very long hours now especially during his nap. Anyway, he still has successfully obtain this skill. It takes a while but finally acheived it.

Imaginative Play

The first sign of imaginative and pretend play emerge around 12-18 months. Imaginative and pretend play stimulate the cognitive development for creative thinking and creates opportunities for exploration. At this early form of imaginative and pretend play, toddlers will emerge into solitary play until he reaches 2-years old.

This is a little facts about imaginative and pretend play. How about a 10-months old? My Maximus has already potraying his first sign of imaginative and pretend play. He started it in his late 9-months and becoming more obvious in his 10-months. How does he do it? It started with his interest in cars and ability to make the sound of the car "vroom..." Then, he enjoys playing with the remote control (for TV, fan, DVD player and air-cond). Soon, everything turn out to be an imaginative play for him. He turns the remote-control up-side-down and starts to play like how he plays his toy car. He pushes it around and makes the sound of it... the vroom sound. He discovers that the remote-control is fun to use as a car especially when it moves with the rubbery texture with the buttons downwards.

Next, the sign of him emerging into his imaginative and pretend play was to use the remote-control as a telephone. But he only use the black colour remote-control to be his phone. The reason is that mummy's mobile phone is black. Other than a remote-control, he took my mobile phone pouch (black too) to be his phone. Guess he watches us doing it so often that he begins to imitate our action through his imagination. I hope to capture some photos to support my observation and also to keep it a memory.

Since Maximus is in my womb, I knew he will turn out to be a creative person... it's the pre-natal education and exposure. I was doing a lot of creative work with children for a full 30 weeks of my pregnancy when I started working in a preschool.

I thank God for this wonderful gift upon Maximus. All in all, it's HE who giveth all... Praise Jesus.

A 10-months old Book's Lover

Maximus was given the exposure on books since he was 3-months. It begun with the cloth book about Lady Bug. Since then, he was cooing as interacting to it. Now, at 10-months Maximus has a good attention-span in reading a book. He enjoys looking and interacting with it. Yet, he understands and able to point out the pictures associated with the words when being asked. It started when he was 8-months when he pointed at the picture of the teddy bear when I asked him "Where is bear-bear?". His vocabs has expanded so much that he can basically understand common instructions such as "Give mummy the book.".

I have to admit that he is a book's lover. He loves his books more than any other toys except for his toy car. He can spend time looking and interacting with it. Being a mummy, I am of course happy but I don't want him to turn out to be a "book-nerd"! Daddy doesn't like reading... so it must be from my side, or his 3rd ah-kor (aunty) who is a bookworm. He enjoys going to the book store compare to the toy store. He has a longer attention span with his books compare to playing with his other toys (of course not his toy-car). He is indeed a bookworm then! His language development covers most of the things he sees from his books other than exploring the outside environment. And of course I spent more on books (got tax rebate) each time I want to get him something.

Mostly, Maximus doesn't abuse or mistreat those books... the only book that he tore was the sensorial book with flap. He tore out the grasshopper that can turn around and the flap for the peek-a-boo game. Other than that, he can handle a book very well even reading it the right way! What a progress for a 10-months.

Boys and their heavy vehicles

I think this is very natural and common... Boys and their vehicles (especially car). Even to a 10-months old, my little Maximus is already enjoying his toy car and everything with wheels. He started showing his interest in cars since in his late 6-months old. He will play with his toy car for hours and independently.

Then, at his 9-months he began to imitate the sound of cars "vroom....vroom...vroom" each time when he plays his toy car. And now, the latest development at 10-months Maximus enjoys looking at pictures of cars and other vehicles (with 4 wheels). He is able to associate it with cars and will intereact with it by making his usual sound "vroom...vroom". He enjoys looking at books and especially related to vehicles.

Recently in Borders, he got hold of the heavy vehicles book - Trucks, Touch and Learn. I am impressed with his attention span. He is so independent and behaving like a toddler instead.

Check out the video.

Climbing up the stairs

Being a curious and active explorer, a 10-months baby will start to move around and about. This is the same for my lil Maximus. He is so fast crawling around and prefer to be free from his walker. He will crawl at every corner of the room, and look out for new things to explore. Maximus is very persistent in knowing his wants and if he refused he will insist not to have it at all. For instant; being in the walker. If he refused to be put into his walker he will throw himself backward, refused to bend his knees to sit and started to wail.

At this moment, his favourite corners are: near the staircase, the door, the telephone cables and near cupboards. Each time when he is near the staircases he will try climbing up the steps. 1...2...3... and he will stop because it's too high for him. Haha... I am not sure if he has height phobia just like his daddy! Then he will slowly slide down. Of course being parents, we have to always keep watch when he is near the staircase.

Check out the video

1...2...3... steps and back down! With daddy holding onto him.

Settling himself to sleep Part 2

There was the part 1 of this blog title. Then now it's the 2nd part especially when now my lil Maximus is going to be 1-year old. There are so many things to get him ready as he steps into his toddler's stage and one of it is to settle himself to sleep independently. Since when Maximus turned 6-months old, I was wanting to get him to be independent in his sleeps. But not successful because he had already associate sleeping with breastfeeding!

But I can't be doing it anymore especially when the number of teeth he has increased! It's painful! So I have decided to cut down the number of breastfeeding during the odd-hours when he suddenly awaken. I tried to pat-a-pat him, reassure him to get back to sleep, and get him into his comfortable position. He whines and tosses around to look for his comfortable position. I started this early this week and during the first attemp he did settle back to sleep when i pat-a-pat him gently on his butt. Yes, I thought that he has learned and get the message.

But, I was counting my chicks too early... the second day, he whined and started to climb out from his cot! Oh... hinting to me that he wants to be carried while pulling my pyjamas. Sigh... get his daddy (Jin) to cuddle him to avoid him wanting to be breastfed. Unfortunately from whining it turns to crying so we have to give in. Ops... failed!

Till today, we are still trying to let him to settle himself back to sleep especially when he jerked up from it. The cutest event was he did settle to sleep independently this dawn but in our bed tucked in between the both of us. Owh... sleeping in his comfort between mummy and daddy.

Well, I have to continue to train him so that he will learn how to settle himself to sleep. Soon, when he turns one, we will move him into the single bed from his cot! At the moment, we have so save up first since we have gotten the car-seat instead.

I hope in this 2 months of lesson, Maximus will learn fast and get to settle himself to sleep independently soon. *fingers-crossing

Maximus with a new-born baby

It's the pre-natal education that shape my lil Maximus to be so socialable and aware of other children. Maximus has a good social-development which he enjoys the company of other children and looking forward to interact with them. At home, he can't bear to play alone although he can be independent. He enjoys playing with his cousins and gets every excited when having them around.

Last Saturday, Jin's cousin wife

just delivered a baby boy. We went to visit them. We thought that Maximus wasn't able to understand what's a baby and won't show any interest. But we were wrong! Maximus was so excited and wanted to touch the baby when he was at close proximity with the baby. Of course Jin has to keep watch and be at control because we were afraid that Maximus might just get too rough with the lil baby.

Maximus's expression and response amazed us too. He pointed at the baby and went "ohhh... uhh... ahhh boo..." as he wants to express himself in words. Well, of course we responded saying that "Yes, that's a baby! Maximus is the kor-kor to the baby now." It's a great experience for Maximus and this will enhance his future development in his social-emotional area.

Musical Ride - Movement Vs Without

The Musical rides are always an attraction to children from different ages. Normally the musical ride comes with the shape of a car, train or boat! The very normal musical ride is the merry-go-round! These musical rides has been a children enjoyable ride and usually we can get it from funfairs. But now, it's becoming such a norm! There are musical rides everywhere and they only cost from RM 1 or RM 2 for a ride!
We gave Maximus the experience on the musical ride during our visit to Malacca. It was in Pahlawan Mall and there are so many types of musical rides at the center of the shops in the mall. These rides not only attract children but adult too... those adults were seen resting in the rides. And some even leave their elder children on the ride (without movement) while they go for s quick shop. Maximus got to ride on the Safari Car ride with animals around him. But it seemed that he enjoys the ride without the movement comparing to when it was moving. He was more focus on the buttons and the stering wheel after the musical ride stopped. When he was riding during it moved, he looked rater shock and sat very still. Maybe it's his first experience and he has not yet learn to apprecitate or enjoy such movement on a ride. At this age the only fun-ride is a car ride and also the rocking for the cradle.
This ride is rather attractive and cool too... some elder children were playing role-play on it! But Maximus was just having his own fun and exploring it.
Enjoy the video-clips

The musical ride with movement


The musical ride after the end of the movement

Play area in IKEA

Digging into those stored photography in the phone gave me an inspiration to write about the playing area in IKEA.It's a very good experience for children to explore and try out the toys displayed before buying them... of course after also considering the price too. This is the first time giving Maximus the opportunity to explore on his own since he is able to stand independently after all.
He enjoys the standing frame that he was able to cling to it and cruise about... it cost RM 149 for that piece of toy! So we are not willing to spend such amount for a toy!

The rocking reindeer and the rocking chair caught Maximus of surprise and instead of enjoying the ride, he was more curious to watch how the chair is rocking.

Being so timid

Maximus is rather timid when come to sounds or things that he is unfamiliar. When he heard a loud sound, he will cry immediately. He won't dare to touch any unfamiliar objects i.e. the fern leaf, or the brush. He still like to observe his environment and surrounding but we have to encourage him to explore using his multi-sensory especially his touch.
As for loud sounds, we have to comfort him most of the time - a loud sneeze, or door slammed. I read from http://www.babycenter.com.my/baby/development/10mth/ it's just part and parcel of the 10-months development. Handling fear the right way will definitely help our baby to be more confident and bold to explore later.
So, Jin and I have been always assuring Maximus and explaining to him things that he is not familar or unable to understand. Most of the time we show him by example. We will always demonstate to him and encourage him to imitated us. Hopefully, this will help him to handle his fear.

Climbing

Ohh... No! This is the nightmare! Maximus is starting to climb and he is climbing over any hurdle - over the cot, onto the stool, on the couch and from the floor to the bed! My mummy even encourage him to climb onto the coffee table! Sigh... not sure if it's suppose to be a good experience for him or shouldn't have encourage him.
Now, being 10 months, we have to watch him very closely - can't leave him unattended or on his own in the bed or floor! I do hope that he won't learn to climb out from his walker... since his walker is the only thing that we can leave him in without much supervision.
Anyway, he will also soon learn and experience the consequences when he is not careful but I do not hope for anything bad to happen to him. Have to be on close watch and alert at all times for now...

Lord Jesus, please watch over Maximus and keep him away from any harm and injury. If he would to fall again, oh... Jesus I prayed that you will catch him so that he will land safely without much injury. Thank you Jesus for your protection and care. Glory! In Jesus's name I prayed. Amen.

The Fall

My most paranoia when come to Maximus's safety is falling. I have to face this phobia and it just happened on Friday morning. Maximus fell from the bed! It all happened due to Jin's carelessness! But I don't blame Jin for it although I was furious in for a short while. It can also be my fault too since I was the one rearranging the position of the cot!
It happened every early when I in the shower before going to work. Jin was being such a sleepy head just left him playing in his cot. But Maximus crawled out from his cot without Jin realised since he was asleep. How does he crawl out? It's also due my fault since I didn't close the cot. The cot was connected to our bed with the barricade down. I was supposed to close the barricade when Maximus has started crawling but since it's more convenience for me during the night feeding, I just left it as is it!
I was in the shower when I heard a loud bumb and then few second later ... the loud wailing, scream... I rushed out from my shower with my towel on and grabbed Maximus from Jin. It was a very heartaching moment and I looked into Jin with furious but I also see the guilty look and hurt in him too. So I do understand that he does feel double worst than I felt!
We checked his head for any bumps but thank God! It's a miracle that he is fine... maybe his head is as hard as a coconut! hehe... Of course without the bumps do not mean it's fine too... Got my mil to monitor him later. I called up in the afternoon and found out that Maximus was completely fine - eating well, active and feeling as normal!
I really thanked God for HIS protection and blessing. Yes, every night I pray and I know that HE listens to my prayer and took care of our little one. Thank you, Jesus for keeping Maximus from any injury, harm and danger. Praise the Lord and to God be the glory...
As for percaution, I have close the barricade but there is no assurance of the safety too since he can climb out from the cot. He did it the next morning... so all I need is a close watch, lots of prayer and God to watch over us.

Maximus's Acheivment at 9 months old

Maximus has a great acheivment in his development. From 9 months onwards till reaching 10, he surprises me with his ability in the physical development componen. At early 9 months, his gross motor skills are:

1. pulling himself up with the support of a furniture.
2. clinging to a low stool and start pushing it around as to attempt to walk.
3. walking with support.
4. lifting up his butt while in crawling position as an attempt to stand up.
5. kneeling and playing
6. kicking a ball with support

His fine motor skills and eye-hands coordination skills are:

1. turning the pages of the book
2. pressing button
3. feeding himself
4. scratching
5. putting objects into a container
6. sacking things
7. throwing
8. pointing to an object accurately

His understand of instruction is pretty much of an improvement. His vocabulary increased so much although he has not yet learn to talk. Although he is still babbling and making sounds, he is already able to relate real vocabulary into his language processing.

His language ability covers:

1. Where is the key?
2. Show mummy where is the dog, cat, bird, car, plane, motorbike, book, ball, fan, light and key?
3. Does Maximus want milk? - He will pull mummy's blouse
4. Where does Maximus want to go? Point to mummy? - and he will either point to upstairs, to the door or the kitchen.
5. Let's go - he will start lifting up his both hands to be carried and getting very excited.
6. When something drops he goes "Ohhh..."
7. He likes to make the sound of the motorbike and car.
8. Show mummy how to switch on the fan? - he will push the little button on the fan (mini-fan).
9. Which one is mummy's car?
10. Where is yeh-yeh, po-po, daddy ...? - he is able to point to them or wave at them.
11. Say "hi" - he will raise his hand and wave while saying "ahhh..."

His social and emotional developemnt

1. He shy away when someone starts to approach him.
2. Give a cool look (without smile) when meeting new people.
3. Trying to shake hands with family members.
4. Cry when being sounded of his wrong doing i.e. putting things into the mouth.
5. Feel jealous or being possesive when mummy carries another baby.
6. Able to kiss mummy or daddy
7. Manja especially after waking up
8. Give Hi-5 when being asked.
9. Will accept some of mummy or daddy's friend after awhile.
10. Will not stay away from mummy or daddy in a new place.

There are so much of Maximus acheivement that I just want to jot down everything, record them but it's so much better having to experience it personally. It makes me feel so proud of my son while thanking God for HIS wonderful gift and blessing.

I have a diary that I recorded down by filling in the blanks and even writing in blog. Yet, I feel there are so much more to write and talk about.

Keeping journal, in blog, photo albums...the best is still having to experience it in real life. I am always missing my lil one when I am at work from 8-5:30 Monday to Friday.

Growing Smarter Every Day

The idea to write this blog was derived from the Huggies website:

http://www.huggies.com.my/BeingAParent/CognitiveSkills/GrowingSmarterEveryDay.aspx

After reading the article, I do agree that every baby does grow smarter every day as they begin to explore, experience and enrich from their environment / surrounding.

Maximus is also part of the process in growing smarter every day. As he turns 10 months this week, he has a profound milestones since birth. Every day is a progress from one point to another. Of course as a mother, I am proud of the little thing that he acheived and want to tell the whole world about it. However, I want to be sure that as this development moves on I have to continue to stay proud of this acheivement even in his older age. Most parents are being so kiasu and fail to praise or be proud of their children little achievement when they reached the primary age. For example; my primary 3 nephew when he scored a 90% for Maths or what-so-ever subject, his mother will ask "Why only 90%? How about so and so?" This is a very normal remarks. I hope I won't be part of this kiasu group of parents for Maximus or other child of mine in the future.

How does Maximus grow smarter every day?

Maximus learns from his observation, experimentation and imitate the actions shown. He also learn from his experiences (good or bad) and will remember them. I am sure this is the naturally skills given to every baby from God. He also begin to create his own "cause and effect" in his play. For example; dropping different plastic balls and identify the ball that bouce (He has a set of balls with different texture and effect) then he will just pick up that particular ball that bounces and continue dropping it to watch it bounce.

Every day is an acheivement and my lil one grows smarter each day. I have nothing much to expect since I am sure he will eventually grow at his own pace day-by-day.

Personality trait

Sensitive? Manja? Spoilt? or ... Rebellious? These are some common personality traits that parents consider them as the negative sign. Yet, these are the personality traits that presented by most children especially when they are turning into toddlers or are in the toddlers stage.

This make me thinking... is Maximus being a sensitive child? Or he is just manja? As he is turning 10 months old, he emerges a strong personality and characters of his own. He also develop a mind of his own - knowing what he wants or doesn't, mood changes etc.

With these personality traits, Maximus is getting predictable and easier to understand. Although he cries when he is being sounded for the his wrong doing such as tearing the newspaper or biting the furniture. He will also cry when we startle him with a "Hah!" or "Hoo-Ohhh!" each time when he drops something. This reminded me of an incident when Maximus was holiding a cone of ice-cream and he accidently dropped it! He looked shock and surprising daddy said "Oh...!" and he cried. Then daddy needed to get him another one just to comfort him. (Is it spoiling him?)

However, being a naugthy mummy (by nature) I like to watch him cries especially when we just sounded him with "Hoh-ohhh!" or "Oh...!" or even by saying "No!".

This is Maximus growing-pains as he develops his personality and own characters. I am sure he will out-grown these traits and learn along when he grows with his experience. I hope he will develop into being more emotional independent as he matures.